What About… Song of Solomon 6:5 “Turn Away Your Eyes from Me?”

In the context of the relationship in Song of Solomon, what is plain?
He loves her and thinks she is amazingly incredible – and so writes a song of love that crescendos all the way to the end of the chorus!

  1. beautiful and lovely 6:4
  2. he loves everything about her 6:5b-8
  3. she is perfect and blessed 6:9
  4. the groom is totally enraptured with his bride 7:1-9

In the context of the male interaction with the female…what is evident?
From Scripture: It is a MYSTERY – Proverbs 30:18  kThree things are too wonderful for me; four I do not understand: …and the way of a man with a virgin. NLT says “how a man loves a woman” –

Strange things happen to even the most strong and “together” man when he is smitten with a woman and the whole concept of it is a real wonder to the writer of the Proverbs.

From Experience: Most men, if they are honest will admit to their weak kneed vulnerability when they are even around someone they are enraptured with. Strange man-like qualities seem to melt into a cacophony of romantic silliness, resulting in an impaired emotional state. The sheer power of a woman over the man is a mystery because the man is known to be stronger, and so stable, and solid, and large – and at once he is reduced to a puddle of pitiful weakness. He may forget how to walk exactly. He may easily blush. He may not know how to talk coherently and be reduced to strange noises and grunts.

(The only one I have besides the Scriptures…)
I want to answer the question, is Song of Solomon 6:5 a good thing or a bad thing? From my own experience – and I speak in the second person because it is less embarrassing – the poor man is so smitten in married love that when she flashes those “doves” at him he is afraid he will totally lose it…he has to take her in small doses. If she stairs at him too long – it will knock him out!!!!! The word “overwhelm” in the “Song” also means to “storm.” This is helpful in unlocking the truth the verse is conveying.

In a real loving Christian marriage, her beauty and godly character combine like an intense storm and he, a normally “together” guy senses that he is about to be drowned in it. Any good man who is truly in love (or has been) knows the uneasy feeling of being out of control because of the awesome wonder of having a truly beautiful bride. He is overwhelmed in, not only his senses, but down to the depth of his soul. It feels as though his foundation is rocking and teetering. Like the Psalmist who declared, “such knowledge is too wonderful for me” he asks for a breather.

The glorious and intense blessing of having a help-mate was made into a song on the very first “date.” In Genesis, Adam composed this song: “this at last is bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh.” At last he found this wondrous person who was part and parcel of his own self. Such a gift caused an exclamation of praise and the declaration of the order of the man-woman relationship for all time on this earth, “therefore a man…(shall) hold fast to his wife… and become one flesh.”

My own wife overwhelms me in many ways but none more piercingly than with her own beautiful, blue, pools of sight. They can communicate a variety of emotions and sometimes even complete thoughts dance through those eyes and land in my heart. When they are focused on me, I shudder. I am suddenly young again and I am overwhelmed. I don’t want her to turn away, but at the same time I can only take so much and declare with all of the love in the world and humbly beg her to…”turn away your eyes from me!”

Even good things must be measured. Love too is interspersed with work and thought and normalcy and a million other nuances of reality. When it is time for love’s gaze, every drop is pure and concentrated that only a very small amount is truly needed to exhilarate and shake the very core of my heart!

Notice it does not say…close your eyes. It does say “turn away your eyes from me.” A man who has a jewel for a bride and truly loves her knows in the end he must share her love with others. He cannot hold her captive. She and all the sisters, as members of the believing community are called to be ambassadors, representatives, lovers of lost souls, lovers of the brethren, lovers of God. He doesn’t look on this sharing as a fault, but fosters the love-sharing as a flowering of his bride, the growing up, the love overflowing out of their “garden” and into the lives of others. Out of the safety and strength and wonder of their shared love, others can be won to the cause of the Chief – lover of our souls. Only an in-focused and myopic relationship will be jealous of allowing the love of the “lovers” to be shared with a love-starved world of other people. What must have it been like for the Father to “let go” for a time of His own precious “Son of His love.” For thirty three years it was different in heaven…so imagine the party that ensued when the Victorious King ascended back to the right hand of The Father!

In all of our relationships, sometimes distance reminds us of how special our loved one truly is. When God allows times of difficulties and trials and wraps Himself in a mist, we cry out for “just one look of our Savior.” Thankfully, those desert times don’t last forever, for we have a God who draws near to those who seek Him and how sweet are those times of renewed intimacy with Him when for a short we have had to look away.

Lastly, one thing to think about is this, the Song is art. Metaphors abound there. But good art imitates life and life is like a dance of sorts. Some dances involve staring directly into the eyes of our beloved. Others position ourselves farther away and some face us back to back….But nothing can hold back the wonder for long. The pause is ended. The gaze convenes. Blessings ensue.

Praise be to our God who gives us so many ways to experience Himself through His creation of a wondrous world and even more wonderful people. Though marred by sin, they still hold the image of God. That this God would notice me is a wonder, that He would dance over me and call me His beloved and in rapture ask me to turn away as overwhelmed, “is high, I cannot attain to it.”

How great is our salvation…

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